NEWSLETTER - MAY 2026

Dear Reader,

One of my favorite moments in session work (especially with beginners), is watching the profound SHIFT that takes place when a part (sub-personality) goes from the unforgivable villain of the internal narrative, to the misunderstood hero.

The shift is often subtle - but it is a watershed moment often accompanied by a palpable sense of relief in the room.

Take a common example, that of an “overthinker” part. This is the part that chews on decisions from every possible angle, leading to anxiety, sleeplessness, and analysis paralysis.

And typically, the inner dialogue is something like “if I could get this part of me to SHUT UP, then I could move forward in life”

An adversarial inner relationship = tension, stress, inflammation.

Once a part like this is explored with curiosity, it is most often traced back to an untenable childhood situation where there were big feelings with no solution or support available.

The mind swooped in with this strategy of vigilant overthinking—which probably didn’t help produce any real results, but did likely serve as a distraction from the real boogeyman—the feeling of powerlessness or fear that the situation produced.

If the part was speaking, it might even say something like “I’m sorry, I was just trying to distract you from feeling the hurt.” Hardly villain talk.

Now, this is a generalization of what is often a much more complex and nuanced psychological construction. But, you can probably see that once the positive intention of a part is recognized—the conversation takes a very different tone, one of forgiveness and repair.

And that felt sense of relief in the room? My guess is, it’s the collective exhale of a whole inner family system no longer having to maintain a fighting stance.

Make Friends With Your Mind.

​There are still a few spots left for the “Make Friends With Your Mind” retreat this Saturday. We will be learning some basic tools and techniques from Internal Family Systems, Somatics, Gestalt Therapy and Meditation. We’ll make it fun. We’ll bring curiosity. Compassion will flow.

Registration here.

Now Accepting New Clients

I love this work. I love sharing the tools I have learned; helping my clients navigate their inner world and then watching that ripple out into their external world in remarkable ways. And I also remember feeling SO NERVOUS to begin my inner exploration. It might not be time. But if you are feeling that call - what the Gurdjieff work calls "magnetic center" pulling you towards working on yourself - then I would love to explore with you.

Virtual or In-Person. For details on package rates and special trainings, visit www.tenoxcoaching.com.

Upcoming Workshops & Talks

May 30 - Make Friends With Your Mind Retreat, 10am - 3pm

June 3 - Integration Circle @Kuya Wellness, 6 - 8pm

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I'm so glad we get to stay connected in this way and I'm grateful that you are in my life. Feel free to share this with anyone in your life, and I would love to hear how you are doing.